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Sunday, December 14, 2008

Apples

Girls are like
apples on trees. The best
ones are at the top of the tree.
The boys don't want to reach for
the good ones because they are afraid
of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they
just get the rotten apples from the ground
that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples
at the top think something is wrong with
them, when in reality, they're amazing.
They just have to wait for the right
boy to come along, the one
who's brave enough
to climb
all the way
to the top
of the tree.
I have heard this quote before, but I found it online not too long ago and thought I might share my thoughts with you. My hope is that there are still girls (and women) that have the foundation instilled in them that will keep them at the top of this valuable tree. If I have a daughter, I want this to resound in the back of her head forever...
Looking back, when women were not considered strong, independent, or valuable assets to our society...they were forced to be dependent on men and therefore made to feel of little worth. However, what I find so ironic about these women is that their morals and ethics were so important to them that they took it upon themselves to find their own worth...without looking for it elsewhere. Today, women are just as capable of voting, working, and learning as any man, yet it seems we have lost sight of what is really important....what we emotionally, physically and personally have to offer.
While I was growing up...especially through those awkward pre-teen years...I always felt as if I was the ugly one in the group. All of my girlfriends were dating different guys and seemed to have such confidence (a false sense I later found out). I was so jealous and self-concious because I didn't understand at the time why the popular guys were so interested in them...and not me! My mom always told me that it was because they were intimidated by me and could not find the nerve to talk to me. Yeah right...try telling that to a 13-, 14-, 15-, 16-year old girl who is consumed with the acceptance of her peers! haha! Still at 23 it can be hard to understand this!
I later found out that "those girls" were lowering their standards (what standards they had to begin with..??) and being so easy for the guys to get. The guys knew that they wouldn't be rejected by them...so they were easy to pursue. Shocking... The girls weren't ugly and they could get any guy they wanted to...without lowering their standards. I'm not preaching on my blog...as I have no place to do so. We have all made mistakes in order to fill some kind of human need we think is necessary at the time...only to feel dissapointed at the end (disapointment: (def) a feeling of sadness or frustration because something was not as good, attractive, or satisfactory as expected, or because something hoped for did not happen...very important emotion God gave us to enable us to learn from mistakes....)
In college, I have gone from boyfriend to boyfriend without ever really making anyone pursue me the way I would have liked. Although I have many regrets from each relationship, I have found out so much about myself and what I don't want in my next relationship. I refuse to be the spoiled, rotten, easy apple at the bottom of the tree. Over the past few years, I have taken a step back and looked at myself and what I believe I have to offer to people...and it is far from something that will come without a price or a fair amount of work involved. I am an attractive, hard-working, independent, Christian, fun-loving, easy partier, humorous, college-educated, stylish, southern, goal-oriented, motivated...woman. Why should that be so easily won over by a man who does not have the same to offer me ?? You think I am going to give all of that..my entire self worth...to someone who is egotistical, lazy, rude mannered, prideful, co-dependent, needy, selfish, consumed with physical appearances (FYI: I won't look this way forever...and neither will you...) incincere, hypocritical, dishonest...??? Hell no!
I'm sorry hunny, if your climbing gear is malfunctioning...your apple will be waiting for you on the ground.


1 comment:

Heather said...

Awesome post!! Very well said. Never, EVER lower your standards for a guy. If they don't work to get you, they don't deserve you. And I love how you view yourself. Knowing exactly who you are makes it easy to tell guys exactly what you're not.
Keep preachin' girl. :)

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I am a 20-something young woman growing up and experiencing the things my mother warned me about...love, friendship, hard work, disappointment and success.