Writer's Workshop: My 10 Biggest Fears

My tribute to Mama's Losin' It....Enjoy!


1. Bugs! Anything creepy and crawly!! eeewwwhhh!! I think I developed this fear from my mom (who claims she can 'smell spiders' haha!!). Growing up, if we found a bug in the house when we were home with just my mom, she would not step on it or even sweep it out the door. Instead...she would put a cup on top of it and wait for my dad to come home. Usually by that time, the thing had suffocated and there was nothing to worry about. We moved out to South Carolina from California when I was about six and the "variety of bugs" multiplied significantly!! During the transition of moving across the country, we lived with our grandparents (my dad's parents) for a few months and I remember my grandma coming home one day to find about five cups turned upside down all over her house!! She still thinks its hilarious! Scorpions, spiders, roaches...oh my!!
2. Being Alone....I don't want to be the "old cat lady..." Need I say more???
3. Heights...Period...
4. Bridges: You may think this ties into the "heights category" but I'm not scared of bridges because they are high, I am scared of bridges because they have the potential to collapse! That would be absolutely terrifying!
5. Being kidnapped. I am terrified of someone taking me and not being able to escape. If I am ever missing...do NOT..and I repeat...do NOT stop looking for me!!!!
6. Blood. I wasn't aware that this was an actual fear of mine until about a month ago. I work at a hotel and I received a phone call that a guest had fallen in the shower and split her head open. When I arrived at work the lady (who was no less than 85 years old) was being wheeled out by the paramedics waving and thanking us for a "great stay!" Keep in mind she was covered in blood and had a bandage wrapped around her head like a war victim from a Turner Classic Movie...but thats beside the point. I went up to the room with our houseman, Ricardo, and found the bathroom to be covered in blood. It looked like the lady had exploded. There was blood in the bathtub, on the walls, the toilet, the floor and there was a pile of bloody towels on the floor. I had my gloves on with the full intention of helping but as soon as I saw her blood...my body went numb! Poor Ricardo ended up cleaning the whole bathroom and listening to me ask "what's that smell..." and "what do you think that is..??" That was the day I found out I had a fear of blood...
7. Death. I don't fear death because I fear where I will be going...I know I am saved and will be living eternity in Heaven!! A great feeling to have by the way!!! I fear the way I am going to die..I fear loosing my loved ones and feeling that pain. Death is inevitable, there is no way around it...I think that is what I fear most....that it is going to happen.
8. Disappointment. As a 23-year-old college graduate with a full-time job who supports myself and has lived alone since I was 18, I find comfort in approval. Whether it be my parents, my friends, co-workers or bosses...there is nothing more satisfying than hearing a simple "good job" or "I'm proud of you." However, the secret to this is that you can't do things in your life expecting those words of praise. If you do, you will be miserable simply because it is very rare that people will swallow their pride and acknowledge your achievements.
9.Opinions. "I have the hots for a little thing called confidence..." People can be so cruel sometimes. As a girl, I worry about my appearance and want people to notice me...not because I have a zit or because I'm having a bad hair day!! Despite what I might say (like most 'normal' people) I do care what other people think about me. "Sticks and stones may hurt my bones but words will never hurt me..." Who made that up?!?
10. Haunted Houses. As the Halloween holidays are quickly approaching, I think about how scared I am of haunted houses. The first (and last) haunted house I visited was about 3 years ago in Columbia, SC with my ex-boyfriend and his family. This particular haunted house was named one of the scariest houses in the South and therefore it took a few days of convincing to get me to go. The whole thing terrified me but it was the individual maize at the end that was the worst! They would send us through a dark, narrow and slimy hallway that you had to find your way out of as "things" were jumping out at you. There were dead ends and 'wrong ways' which I seemed to find alot of...needless to say, I ended up in a fetal position in the corner crying for my friends to come get me. They turned the lights on and stopped the course to take me out...only to be chased by a man with a chainsaw!! Bless my heart, huh?? Never again!!!!!

ok...I'm finished!